The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey

This blog is separated into two parts; One I wrote on December 14th, and one I wrote today.
I hesitated posting on December 14th because I wanted to see the movie again before I wrote a review, and I didn't have any pictures to go along with it, and that just isn't acceptable!

(I'm sorry about the quality of most of the picture: They were taken on my cell phone and in a great rush.)

PART 1:
Today is December 14th, 2,000 and 12, which only means one thing:
We have a week to live!
But that's okay, I can die happy because, at exactly midnight today (thought it feels like yesterday) The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (or as I so fondly refer to it as, A Long Expected Journey) began to play in theaters.
But I should probably back up a bit.
After weeks of meticulous planning, me and my friend Lizzie, her sister and two of my sisters got into my little car and headed down the highway toward Spokane.
We were on a mission, and not just any mission: We were on our way to see the first part of The Hobbit. Somehow, we managed to get off on the wrong exit a number of times, but due to my wonderful navigationally-corrective brain, we made it to the hotel just fine... But not before my car decided to act up.
It made horrendous noises upon breaking, and continued to due so until I exilerated to at least 45 miles an hour. Needless to say, I was not happy about that.
But, I called my dad at the hotel and he identified the problem, and said we were okay to drive to the theater and back.
Thank goodness, because there isn't anything I wouldn't have done to get there on time. (Eg. Driving a potentially dangerous car, giving a taxi half my money, hitchhiking. Yeah, you get the picture)

We were in luck after that, because there just so happened to be a Denny's a matter of feet away from our hotel, and as some of you rascals know, Denny's is serving HOBBIT FOOD (for a limited time only).
It was the obvious choice.
They have a special Hobbit themed menu, and just looking at it put glitter in my bloodstream.
I got the Hobbit Hole Breakfast, and along with it, two Hobbit trading cards.
Fantastical, all around.

We then went back to the hotel and lazed around quite royally for an insane amount of time; Hours and hours that just so happened to be crawling along at a morbid pace.
I wanted to see that darn movie, and I wanted to see it RIGHT NOW!
Finally, it was time to depart.
It was my first time driving through the heart of Spokane, so my wrong turns were readily forgiven.
We picked up our tickets and headed upstairs where we were greeted at the entrance to The Hobbit with special 3D glasses and *gasp*  not just one, but FOUR magical and FREE Hobbit posters ^_^
One of Bilbo, one of Gandalf, one of Gollum and one of Thorin.

                                                    Here's a picture, just to make you drool:

We ended up arriving two and a half hours early. A little late to show up for a midnight premier, especially one the magnitude of Peter Jackson's newest addition to the Tolkien film-world, but I made calculations based on the size of Spokane and the size of the theater, and I was right.
We got good seats (Not THE BEST seats, but much better than the people who showed up later (AKA on time) ) and Cherry Coke, and began the countdown.
24 oz of coke (In a Hobbit themed cup, no less!) and an hour later, I was starting to feel like a circuit board splashed with water.
I think my skin was the only thing keeping me from bursting into a million pieces.
I'm being overly dramatic, I know, but that's just how I felt.
Exaggeration aside, I WAS extremely excited.

Side note: To the guy sitting behind me in the theater whom I talked to: I think you are a brilliant human being, and I sincerely wish I would have gotten your name!

Finally, the previews began playing, and though I was confused because it was early, happiness still resounded in my bones. Sadly, the "auto-start" (as the apologetic employee called it) was having problems, so the previews were premature. We sat around for another ten minutes, after which the previews started again, this time an actual prelude to the movie.
And THEN! Well, then The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey began to play.



PART 2:

This isn't going to be a quote on quote "normal" review, because, for one thing The Hobbit isn't a normal movie, and for another, I am not a normal person.

Generally, there are two reasons people read a review:

1. They've already watched the movie, and they want another's opinion on it.
                        or
2. They haven't seen the movie and want to know if it's worth watching.

If you are in category one, the spoilers (there will be spoilers!) and such are not going to bother you.
And if you are in category two, I just have to ask, what is wrong with you?
It's THE HOBBIT! You don't need a reason to go watch it!


The first time I saw The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey, I was a a little disappointed.
It felt different than Lord Of The Rings, which is actually to be expected.
Lord Of The Rings fans can't go into this expecting it to be some replica of the beloved trilogy.
But, that being said, there was a certain "feeling" prominent in LOTR that is sorely missed here.
The only way I can describe it is "fantasy"
That wonderful feeling you get when you are being told a fairy tale,
and it is being told very, very well.
In The Hobbit, that feeling is replaced by, for lack of a more descriptive term, "action".
I found parts of the movie blown out of purportion  and unbelievable.
I know it's strange to say that a movie whose main characters are Dwarves, Hobbits, and Wizards is not believable because of it's action scenes, but that is where I stand.
When I watched Lord Of The Rings, it found a place in my heart where it is easily believed.
The Hobbit, on the other hand, found no such foothold. Perhaps it will take time.
Although I found the large amount of humor fun and satisfying to watch, it gave the movie an unrealistic feel.
And the action scenes where amped up, changing parts of the book to make said scenes "more interesting".
For example: The scene in the trees, right after the group has escaped The Misty Mountains. The trees end up falling into each other, creating a domino affect and leaving all the characters in a tree hanging on precariously to the ledge by just it's roots. The attacking orcs are held at bay by a fire started with magically lit pine cones.
Also, Radagast's sled dog-type team of "Rhosgobel rabbits". Enough said.
I suppose all this was added to keep the pace fast, and perhaps get your heart pounding a little.
Really though, Kili's laugh at Bilbos' table did that well enough for me.

The second time I saw the movie, I was much more satisfied. I was no longer distracted by my own overwhelming excitement, and I now knew what to expect from an Imax 3D experience, so the graphics ceased to be distracting and instead added to the experience.
I laughed more, definitely smiled more, and just had a great time.
Of course, I also noticed new things about the film that didn't match up with the book, but that's always going to happen.
So, I'd really suggest you go to see this movie more than once, if you weren't planning to already.
I'm already making plans to see it in my local theater, without the bells and whistles of 3D and such.

As for the music: it was beautiful, if not a little repetitive
I'm dying to buy the soundtrack, and annoy my family half to death by playing it endlessly for at least 42 hours. The adaption of the songs from book to movie is done nicely. Of course, not precisely, but like I said, nicely.
All in all, this movie is a completely different creature than the Lord Of The Rings trilogy, as it must be, because The Hobbit was written as a children's book, and therefore the tone is naturally going to be different and lighter, no matter the eminent danger our beloved heros encounter.
When it comes down to it, you can never truly satisfy a die-hard Tolkien fan with a movie adaption.
It cannot be done, because of the vast differences in writing a book and making a film.
So, I'm okay with some changes, as long as the heart of the movie remains with the book, and I believe The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey did that.
Over all, I found the film extremely enjoyable, and can't wait until it comes out so I can own it and hold it in my hands and show it to all my family members while smiling like an idiot.

Now, for the specifics:



Things I didn't like:

1. Bilbo's hair.

I'm I the only one who found those bangs highly distracting?


2. Either there were no dwarf women, or the dwarf women didn't have beards.

Either way, this is an unhappy thing.
I've read comments from people saying "Female dwarves don't actually have beards! Aragorn was joking when he said that in Lord Of The Rings!" *Ahem* Read this, noobs: Dwarf Women
In the beginning of the move, we see terrified dwarves running from the gates of Erebor.
Some are obviously male dwarves, but I know I spotted at least three female characters here.
Now, some people are saying these could be humans from the nearby town of Dale.
But, I don't see how that adds up.
I didn't see dwarves in Dale, so why would there be humans in Erebor? Also, these "dwarf women" were the same height as the rest of the dwarves. So, unless only midgets are allowed in the great dwarf city, I don't believe these were human women.
I've heard opinion, from exploring forums and comments on the movie, that this decision was made to stop in advance accusations of "sexism". Since there is already a lack of strong female characters in The Hobbit, it's thought that people may protest what they see as a "lack of female dwarves" especially since this is more of a family orientated movie.
Here's what I have to say to that: If you are so very focused on the movie that you happen to notice a lack of females pouring out of a dwarf city in a scene that lasts a number of seconds, then you are most likely an avid fan like me, and know about the beards.
And if, for some reason, someone did notice the "absence" of dwarf women, and were so upset that they had to make a loud fuss, they would soon be put to rights by the nearest Tolkien fan, wither online or in person.

Things I liked:

1. Frodo's cameo.

As a major Frodo fan, how could this NOT make me happy? I'll, ashamedly, admit that I let out a little fan-girl sign when he came onscreen. He looked just like he does in Lord Of The Rings, and I found his performance charmingly believable. But then again, I may be biased. ;]

2. Sebastian the Hedgehog

Just, SO CUTE.


Things I hated:

1. Azog The Defiler. AKA "The Pale Orc"

Really, I shouldn't have to elaborate on this.
Even if you haven't read the books or aren't a big Tolkein fan, this character should have disgusted you with his one-dimentional quality.
He was put into the movie for one purpose alone: To add a tangible "Bad guy" since Sauron hasn't reared his ugly head yet, and Smaug is miles and miles away.
This was obvious to me.
If this was so important, Peter Jackson could have at least made a better character.
Azog seemed ridiculous  both from the cookie cutter bad guy feeling he exerted, and the transparency of his next move.
Killing the leader of a failed mission? How original.
Laughing evilly as your pray falls? Never would have expected THAT!
 "That one's mine." Lovely. Just lovely.
In the actual Tolken world, Azog was killed in battle years before The Hobbit takes place, and not even by Thorin Oakenshield
Read this, if you don't believe me: Proof Of Said Transgression
And here I thought Evangeline Lilly's character was the worse blasphemy that was going to transpire!
Again, as I said, it's not only that it goes completely against the holy word of Tolkien.
Azog, in this movie, is an unwanted kind of character.
Evil just because he is evil, predictable, and altogether an unwholesome addition.
That being said, there was one moment, the second time I watched the film, where I just stared into his eyes and became ridiculously frightened for absolutely no reason. And for that split second, I believed he was real. I'm in love with that second. Everything else: Blah.


2. The fact that the last third of the "Time Riddle" was cut off in the Riddles In The Dark scene.

I will never, not in all my days on this earth, understand how it is SO VERY HARD to include those last 9 words. It would have taken SECONDS.
Not including all the riddles, I can understand. There is a pressing of time and such.
But saying only part of a riddle, when the rest could have very easily been included, BLOWS MY MIND and not in a god way.
You may think I'm overreacting, and maybe I am. But usually when someone makes an obvious adaption, it's for a very good reason. Those I can live with. But here, I see no "good reason" to do this to such a beloved line of the book.

I'll put it here, so you good souls can at least see it SOMEWHERE that has to do with this movie.

Slays King, ruins town,
And beats high mountain down.

R.I.P. Beloved artifact of my childhood. You have been slain in the mind of those who haven't read your words from the pages of The Hobbit.

Things I loved:

1. The white stag ridden by Thranduil near the beginning of the movie. It took my breath away!
It magnified majesty and a controlled calm, like some kind of pure token of peace, but a peace that is so because it is strong and refrained.
(I believe a white stag appears in The Hobbit book, somewhere in Mirkwood? Do tell me if I'm incorrect.)

2. Everything else in the movie.

I think that covers it, yeah.




And that's just me speaking as a snarky, die-hard fan.
If I measure The Hobbit purely as a movie, and not a book adaption,
then it's SO SPECTACULAR!
(Except for Azog... I still can't stand him)